Okay. So, finally, it is happening. You got a ‘yes’ from your crush, and you are floating among the clouds. Those dreams of getting hitched to your favourite friend, vacating on a cruise or walking on the grassy meadows in a valley or somewhere soaking around in the sunbath on a tranquil white sandy beach or even making out in a treehouse, all of it might soon become a reality, provided your crush gets the impression that you are worth it.
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It is a big deal to impress your friend on the very first date of yours. In the case of marriages arranged, It might be your first time to sit and talk to your quite possible match. But instead of the cupid arrows, our stupid acts can drown the whole ship in a few seconds. And goes the infamous saying, the first impression becomes the last impression.
Let me brief out the typical first date mistakes you are prone to make to spoil your fancy evening.
1. Being late
Ouch! Making your date wait for you would rather upset that person even before knowing the real you. You might be tagged as a non-punctual and irresponsible person for like ever. Your date might misunderstand the situation, finding themselves not important enough in your life. So even if you get late to the venue, please make sure that you get some arrangements and favours made to your date in your absence as well, so that the impression goes rather positively.
2. Disagreeing on the venue
There are people who like grooving bars, others have an affinity towards fine dining restaurants, or even they might want to go to some natural habitats like parks or adventure zones like trekking etc. So before finalizing the venue, if possible, try to make sure about the taste of your concerned person. The more comfortable your partner is, the better your date will be.
3. Being rude to your server
This is definitely in the checklist of your dating partner. They are pretty observant of all your traits. All your love and affection will become trash if you do not have a warm heart towards service people. Treating somebody in a unique way and ill-treating your subordinates in a disgusting way never go hand in hand. It is a turn off instance for them instantly. On the other hand, Showing small acts of kindness and being grateful towards the service community will earn you admiration and appreciations in heaps.
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4. Giving a hard lecture on open-ended issues
If you are going to be dating partners, it does not imply that your opinions must date as well. Becoming much opinionated about any social or personal issues is one of the most prevalent first date mistakes you must avoid. Dating is an open-ended discussion affair. You should never seem to impose your thought process on your mate. You must control your selection of apt words and way of presenting your views. Opinions may differ, and you must respect this aspect of individualism.
5. Bragging about income, possessions or skills
Among the notable points in the list of first date mistakes, this is the most disastrous one. The moment you start crowning yourself, the momentum of the conversation lowers down. By bragging about your income, possessions and individual skills, you are somehow belittling the one who you are supposed to make your life partner someday. Your dating partner is not here to listen to your self-performance – appraisal. Your bio-data does that for you already. He or She wants to see how much simple, open, grounded and well-mannered and well-tuned you are. So portray your kind features instead of proclaiming the throne all by yourself.
6. Bringing your best friend along on the date
Who does this? Yeah right. It is a rare mistake experienced. But there are people who out of nervousness and anxiety, follow this approach. Let me tell you; it is a bad option because it is no longer a date. It might become a group discussion or casual friend’s hangout. Your dating partner may find it awkward to talk to you on various personal issues. This approach does the worse when you are stereotyped as an emotionally challenged person in the eyes of your dating mate.
7. Getting too chatty or cheesy
A date is for two people, to know each other thoroughly. So it is advisable to be short on words at times. You must give enough space in your conversations. If you really look forward to connecting to your date-mate, you must be as good at listening as well. Avoid picking cheesy lines in the process of impressing him or her. Give enough romantic cues but do not overdo yourself.
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8. Being too bossy
You might be Miranda Priestley from ‘The Devil Wears Prada’ or the badass Heisenburg from ‘Breaking Bad’ to everyone but hold on, you need to drop your weapon when you are on a date. The date is about how coherently you can create a romantic vibe all around you. It is about moderation. You must not look like someone in command. Take care of the little things. Show genuine gestures. Trying to dominate your date would be one of the worst first date mistakes.
9. Boasting about self-achievements
You might be topping the charts at school or college or your workplace, even your as well, but your special first date is definitely not the place to showcase it. Usually, it pisses out people. Dating is to know each other as a whole, not just about the accolades and achievements. So, discussing failures may bring you even closer too.
10. Lacking basic table manners
Table etiquettes matter a lot when it comes to dating. Winning a heart straight away has never been this easy. Little sweet gestures and behaviours tell a lot about your personality. Pulling off the chair for a girl, offering your partner the menu card first, talking less while eating, chewing without much sound, paying the bill etc. are few instances where we can mark our impressions right away. Failing to
11. Avoiding eye contact
It is said that eyes are the windows to the soul. Your eyes say a great deal about your character. Making eye contact indicates that you are listening and paying attention well to your partner. It also shows how much focused or interested you are throughout the communication. It indicates your honesty and confidence level. Avoiding eye contacts shows an altogether different picture. It might appear to your partner as if you are least interested in the communication any more. This would exacerbate the situation and diminish the real chances of your teaming up together.
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12. Beating around the bush
Among the first dating mistakes, this one is to be taken care off keenly. Any boring conversation might dim the chances of getting one step closer to your partner. Talking about the matter of friends, friends of friends, office matters or going too much philosophical is already deflecting your purpose of dating. Instead of beating around the bush, discuss on relevant issues, get a taste of her or his likes and dislikes and make your date partner as much comfortable to open up enough and speak their heart out.
13. Becoming judgmental
One must do what one expects. Nobody would like to be judged in the very first meeting. The first date is a crucial point where we are nervous and excited and tend to arrive at judgements quickly. Some of you might consider good looks, good hair, sparkling smile, choice of outfits, shoes etc. while others might attend to keen details like your body language, your communication skills, logical ability, wit and sense of humour among other hidden traits. Keep in mind that first meetings might be deceptive or confusing. If you like or dislike your dating mate, do not arrive at final judgements without giving a chance twice.
14. Not taking your odours into consideration
Odours need the utmost attention when it comes to seeing someone. They quite strongly influence the consequences of your evening. Ignoring your body or mouth odour issues can prove devastating for your dreamy date night. In order to avoid this first date mistake, make sure to keep your breath super fresh and do not skip using exquisite body fragrance. Please note not to overdo it. Trust me, your partner might want to stick to you for all night along.
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15. Doing it the typical date style
A quick suggestion for all the dating aspirants- don’t go for the distinct ways. Following the same repetitive approach might result in an avoidable first date mistake. Going on an unconventional date is the new trend. Think about the out-of-box ideas to kindle the sparks and let them do their magic on your first date occasion. Your dating partner might feel thrilled and excited all along with the date, enough to keep both of you lost in your special moment.
16. Presenting an artificial version of you
If you are going to date for the first time, you will try to make everything extravagant. You would be putting efforts to create a filmy version. In this attempt, you might not remain the real you. You might seem to do a complete look makeover. If not English language friendly, you might speak non-stop terrible English. You might tag yourself as a big-time influencer with a bunch of contacts in hot fields.
In the desperation of getting a ‘yes’, you might paint an entirely different picture of the income status of your family. That is quite a natural phenomenon. We think that we are doing it for our good, which is a serious misconception. The date is not only about the impression game, but it also lays the foundation of a budding relationship nurtured by truth and love. The moment you tend to become artificial, you have successfully created a black hole for the future relationship. So back off from this idea and stay in the real zone.
17. Trying to show off your bank balance
This is the most hated conversation part of any date. Instead of committing this mistake on your first date, know more, show less. That implies that think and discuss more on the radical facets of life rather than going on numbers in your bank account. Be sensitive towards the flow and exchange of emotions. Never try to show off your bank balance.
18. Discussing all your previous relationship(s)
Why to spoil your present for your never returning past? Ask this to yourself before even starting such a weird conversation. By the end of it, it would be putting both of you in hell awkward positions. Remember, discussing your previous relationships is neither heroic nor will it be decorating your first date with beautiful memories. You never know how it will hit on your dating partner’s perception of you as a lover. So avoid committing this grave first date sin.
The first date is always an experience to remember throughout your life. And no first date is perfect. But just in case, if you really want to get to the moon in the first attempt, this blog may prove to be the turning point of your love life. No guarantees but some of these silly mistakes may be spared in your adventurous first date ever.