Love & Relationships

12 Perks of Online Dating

In a better world, where we are seeking out the better ways of everything, dating cannot remain a miss. Online dating is a boon to modern society. Looking at the online dating statistical part, popular dating apps like Tinder, Happn, Woo, OkCupid, TrulyMadly, etc. are seeing a crazy hike in their customer base. With lots of apps crowding the digital space, online dating is experiencing an immense rise in its future scope. The best dating apps are using various features to point out your match within seconds. Despite all of this, the online dating culture is not into full throttle acceptance arena. Many people are still considering it as a threat to their privacy or are just finding it risky.

In the process to add sense to this vulnerable modern approach of dating, let us focus on certain perks of online dating.

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1. It opens up an ocean of options

Earlier, your life was restricted to schools or college or your colleagues. There was hardly anyone you knew or meet outside of your social circle. There was a limited set of options around you. Compromises were common because selections were must. Thanks to the digital age, nothing remained the same. People find it much alluring to get choosy and select from a variety of matchable candidates. You may like or chose somebody far beyond your social network.

Be it online dating applications or matrimonial sites or simply social media platform; you may feel the connection to anyone out of place and out of nowhere. And if you want an actual face-to-face dating interaction, no need for continuing your online communications endlessly. Instead, narrow your search to a specific set of “must-have” features. Talk to those who make it to the list. Go ahead and breathe.

2. Online dating brings two separate worlds together

Love attractions are not religion or caste or race dependent. In fact, opposites attract. Online dating gives a platform to voice your unbiased love to your kind of people from across the world. This system unites us in a unique way where our hearts do not distinguish much. You attempt to outlaw various stigmas at a single time. The tender feelings outweigh the orthodox view of society. You are in the process of opening your heart to someone giving you the tingling out-of-the-world feeling. This online dating concept has literally shrunk the world into a digital minion.

3. It helps to break the ice a lot easier

Since online daters share so much information about themselves in their respective profiles, it is easier to initiate the conversation and hit the right cords. For example, if you see in ‘someone’s profile that they like to watch horror genre movies, you can start it off by asking how he did, or she finds ‘the conjuring’ movie series and both can discuss on and on. You need to pull a Sherlock Holmes and guess more about your partner’s affinities.

4. You enjoy the freedom of expression

Dating becomes more fun when its mode becomes online. You feel like flying without any strings attached. No space for anxiety, nervousness, over-cautiousness, and no need to suffer any melodrama. Precisely, you have adequate freedom of expression. While dating online, the partners do not feel pressurized to express every emotion. The conversation instead becomes genuine and sailing. This liberty to be natural is very much needed for orchestrating the bond development between two interested parties. It is as if you are driving on a highway, enjoying the wind and moving at your own speed. This twosome ride is exhilarating and thrilling.

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5. You become almost omnipresent

Accessibility becomes way too easy and under control. Being busy and not able to see each other does not remain a bother anymore. You can chit chat about your daydreams and troubles any time of the day or can say, night. Your rush hours or far away abode has become a trivial matter concerning online dating. Giving time to your digital love affair has never been this easy. Picking hot spots to meet at or family forbidding you to step out is not hampering your love life anymore. In some sense, you are available everywhere (of course, your Internet services or connecting gadget must be present along with you).

6. Online dating means leaving the orthodox behind

Not everyone is fortunate enough to have a healthy and growing family environment around them. There are still many of us who are surviving a constricted mindset of family values. Following a set of conservative traditions as laid by generations and unable to move on to a sensible and constructive living approach, many people tend to suffocate, suppress, and box their emotions and dreams somewhere else. But the foray of online dating has given them wings. They are daring to love and feel loved in a safe and secure corner of their lives. They are able to make choices, display their true selves, and lead a dream life behind the lens. Online dating is a game-changer for them, at least for a while.

7. It is safer than it appears

In the times of exaggerated cases of frauds, nuisances, blackmailing, relationship burglary, forced relationships, etc., online dating approach is a somewhat safe mode of knowing each other. Yes, there have been plenty of scary stories about online dating, but as of now, it can be termed as a safer option than meeting a random stranger out in the open.

The things you want to reveal or keep hidden is entirely your decision. You are dating someone completely unknown. Definitely, as a mature move, you need not share any of your data until and unless you are convinced enough about the authenticity of your online partner. You can keep your pictures, contact details, address, and family details intact in your hands. Generally, people search through the databases of social media accounts like Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, WhatsApp, etc. as well, to check the authenticity of the partner on the other side.

One can exercise control in delivering only the necessary information required. In any case, prevention is always better than a complaint. Online dating sites have lots of safety features to protect their customers. These include 24/7 customer and help support, moderators to remove fake profiles, and tabs to block and report abusive members. Some sites also verify or do background checks on every member so as to prove their identity match with whatever mentioned in their profile.

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8. Online dating may eliminate stress and anxiety

Many a time, when you have started one relationship, you might find it near to end too soon. Speculations reveal that generally, it happens when either A. You are too good at reading incompatible people around you or B. you are too immature to handle or show the feelings in the natural passionate way. Your spiking anxieties eventually disrupt your two-way communication. But if you are into online dating, bid adios yo these roadblocks. Human psychology plays, and you are in an extremely comfortable zone where you need not confront each other face to face. You can spill your heart and mind out without any fear or complex.

9. It is an easy loyalty tester

If you somehow want to check the loyalty of your partner’s character, it becomes much easier for you in the online dating system. You can impersonate anybody or become whoever you want and ring your partner’s bell. If you are good with words and acting, your partner would be substantially scrutinized without even a hunch of your motive. You need not employ other people to become a part of your saga.

10. You spend a lot less on online dating

Have you ever heard of cost-effective relationship? Well, here is what you need to know. This method of dating asks for the least investment of money on a budding relationship. You get an ample volume of time and space to know about each other. Choosing more carefully who you go out with means you waste fewer dates and invest less time. You need not spend extravagantly on organizing candlelight luxury diners or any musical evening involving exorbitant elements or trips which may cost you dearly. You can abstain from buying expensive gifts for your prince or princess charming for a while. At the stage of online dating, words and feelings hold more value comparatively.

Using innovative apps and sending e-gifts or e-wishes holds the potential of bringing you much closer to each other. There are various affordable dating websites which even offer you trial offers wherein you can zero-in some potential partners good-to-go with. There is always a premium membership option where you can get some advanced search features, but it will definitely cost you cheaper than buying drinks and lavish meals or entry tickets for clubbing, right? Online proposals are not uncommon these days. It saves times and money considerably.

11. Breaking up is less hurtful

Breaking up with your partner always brings irreparable grief but detaching on an online platform makes it slightly more comfortable to be absorbed. The online platform is a volatile one where things might end and start back to back because of the vast numbers of users on either side. You’d hesitate less in initiating it with some other app user. And you would not mind much since you never got involved physically, and you might never be coming across your online-ex any time again without your consent. Also, you might overcome the grimly consequence of your relationship easily with time and well, online dating apps.

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12. The thrill and excitement does not go away quickly

At this specific point, online dating stands at par with an arranged marriage. There is a vast ocean of things to know about your partner in question. Lots of thrills and excitement awaits. The more you know each other, the more you will realize how well tuned you both are. Currently, you might be friends with benefits, but if you get struck by the cupid’s bow, you might turn into souls with the connection.

Several apps and match-making websites have incorporated features which enable you to check for the compatibility points. Few of them also allow you to record and maintain your tuned frequency moments. You can have a checklist of your own to click and save the notable incidents. The online dating process is not meant to be rushed into. You are free to use your time and know your partner’s likes and dislikes, turn-ons and turn-offs, preferences, passions and hobbies, work, academics, anything you wish. It would always be a thrilling ride for you.

Difference Between Traditional and Online Dating

It is true that your relationship will rarely get boring very quickly if you met your partner through online dating. There would be a sense of warmth and cosiness, even in words like ‘hmmm,’ ‘ok,’ ‘ohk,’ ‘okay,’ and ‘kk’ will hold a different meaning to each of them. And this is because you are accustomed to conversing over texts more than in person. Voice and video calls will wire your feelings unconsciously. And you will pay heed to all of the minute details involved in your online conversations, to interpret your partner even more. Since you are going to take it slow, there would always be bundles of information in store for you.

Traditional dating makes you put a lot more effort into your relationship because you have to start from scratch. You have to start from “What do you like doing in your free time?” to “where are you from?”

However, it is crucial to remember that online dating is best used as a resource to meet individuals for eventually facing each other in real date set-up. Keeping that goal in mind will prevent you from pondering over the drawbacks and limitations of dating online.

What are some other perks of online dating according to you? Write them down in the comment section below for your fellow readers!

Love & Relationships

First Date Mistakes – 18 Things You Should Never Do on Your First Date

Okay. So, finally, it is happening. You got a ‘yes’ from your crush, and you are floating among the clouds. Those dreams of getting hitched to your favourite friend, vacating on a cruise or walking on the grassy meadows in a valley or somewhere soaking around in the sunbath on a tranquil white sandy beach or even making out in a treehouse, all of it might soon become a reality, provided your crush gets the impression that you are worth it.

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It is a big deal to impress your friend on the very first date of yours. In the case of marriages arranged, It might be your first time to sit and talk to your quite possible match. But instead of the cupid arrows, our stupid acts can drown the whole ship in a few seconds. And goes the infamous saying, the first impression becomes the last impression.

Let me brief out the typical first date mistakes you are prone to make to spoil your fancy evening.

1. Being late

Ouch! Making your date wait for you would rather upset that person even before knowing the real you. You might be tagged as a non-punctual and irresponsible person for like ever. Your date might misunderstand the situation, finding themselves not important enough in your life. So even if you get late to the venue, please make sure that you get some arrangements and favours made to your date in your absence as well, so that the impression goes rather positively.

2. Disagreeing on the venue

There are people who like grooving bars, others have an affinity towards fine dining restaurants, or even they might want to go to some natural habitats like parks or adventure zones like trekking etc. So before finalizing the venue, if possible, try to make sure about the taste of your concerned person. The more comfortable your partner is, the better your date will be.

3. Being rude to your server 

This is definitely in the checklist of your dating partner. They are pretty observant of all your traits. All your love and affection will become trash if you do not have a warm heart towards service people. Treating somebody in a unique way and ill-treating your subordinates in a disgusting way never go hand in hand. It is a turn off instance for them instantly. On the other hand, Showing small acts of kindness and being grateful towards the service community will earn you admiration and appreciations in heaps.

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4. Giving a hard lecture on open-ended issues

If you are going to be dating partners, it does not imply that your opinions must date as well. Becoming much opinionated about any social or personal issues is one of the most prevalent first date mistakes you must avoid. Dating is an open-ended discussion affair. You should never seem to impose your thought process on your mate. You must control your selection of apt words and way of presenting your views. Opinions may differ, and you must respect this aspect of individualism.

5. Bragging about income, possessions or skills 

Among the notable points in the list of first date mistakes, this is the most disastrous one. The moment you start crowning yourself, the momentum of the conversation lowers down. By bragging about your income, possessions and individual skills, you are somehow belittling the one who you are supposed to make your life partner someday. Your dating partner is not here to listen to your self-performance – appraisal. Your bio-data does that for you already. He or She wants to see how much simple, open, grounded and well-mannered and well-tuned you are. So portray your kind features instead of proclaiming the throne all by yourself.

6. Bringing your best friend along on the date

Who does this? Yeah right. It is a rare mistake experienced. But there are people who out of nervousness and anxiety, follow this approach. Let me tell you; it is a bad option because it is no longer a date. It might become a group discussion or casual friend’s hangout. Your dating partner may find it awkward to talk to you on various personal issues. This approach does the worse when you are stereotyped as an emotionally challenged person in the eyes of your dating mate.

7. Getting too chatty or cheesy

A date is for two people, to know each other thoroughly. So it is advisable to be short on words at times. You must give enough space in your conversations. If you really look forward to connecting to your date-mate, you must be as good at listening as well. Avoid picking cheesy lines in the process of impressing him or her. Give enough romantic cues but do not overdo yourself.

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8. Being too bossy

You might be Miranda Priestley from ‘The Devil Wears Prada’ or the badass Heisenburg from ‘Breaking Bad’ to everyone but hold on, you need to drop your weapon when you are on a date. The date is about how coherently you can create a romantic vibe all around you. It is about moderation. You must not look like someone in command. Take care of the little things. Show genuine gestures. Trying to dominate your date would be one of the worst first date mistakes.

9. Boasting about self-achievements

You might be topping the charts at school or college or your workplace, even your as well, but your special first date is definitely not the place to showcase it. Usually, it pisses out people. Dating is to know each other as a whole, not just about the accolades and achievements. So, discussing failures may bring you even closer too.

10. Lacking basic table manners

Table etiquettes matter a lot when it comes to dating. Winning a heart straight away has never been this easy. Little sweet gestures and behaviours tell a lot about your personality. Pulling off the chair for a girl, offering your partner the menu card first, talking less while eating, chewing without much sound, paying the bill etc. are few instances where we can mark our impressions right away. Failing to

11. Avoiding eye contact

It is said that eyes are the windows to the soul. Your eyes say a great deal about your character. Making eye contact indicates that you are listening and paying attention well to your partner. It also shows how much focused or interested you are throughout the communication. It indicates your honesty and confidence level. Avoiding eye contacts shows an altogether different picture. It might appear to your partner as if you are least interested in the communication any more. This would exacerbate the situation and diminish the real chances of your teaming up together.

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12. Beating around the bush

Among the first dating mistakes, this one is to be taken care off keenly. Any boring conversation might dim the chances of getting one step closer to your partner. Talking about the matter of friends, friends of friends, office matters or going too much philosophical is already deflecting your purpose of dating. Instead of beating around the bush, discuss on relevant issues, get a taste of her or his likes and dislikes and make your date partner as much comfortable to open up enough and speak their heart out.

13. Becoming judgmental

One must do what one expects. Nobody would like to be judged in the very first meeting. The first date is a crucial point where we are nervous and excited and tend to arrive at judgements quickly. Some of you might consider good looks, good hair, sparkling smile, choice of outfits, shoes etc. while others might attend to keen details like your body language, your communication skills, logical ability, wit and sense of humour among other hidden traits. Keep in mind that first meetings might be deceptive or confusing. If you like or dislike your dating mate, do not arrive at final judgements without giving a chance twice.

14. Not taking your odours into consideration

Odours need the utmost attention when it comes to seeing someone. They quite strongly influence the consequences of your evening. Ignoring your body or mouth odour issues can prove devastating for your dreamy date night. In order to avoid this first date mistake, make sure to keep your breath super fresh and do not skip using exquisite body fragrance. Please note not to overdo it. Trust me, your partner might want to stick to you for all night along.

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15. Doing it the typical date style

A quick suggestion for all the dating aspirants- don’t go for the distinct ways. Following the same repetitive approach might result in an avoidable first date mistake. Going on an unconventional date is the new trend. Think about the out-of-box ideas to kindle the sparks and let them do their magic on your first date occasion. Your dating partner might feel thrilled and excited all along with the date, enough to keep both of you lost in your special moment.

16. Presenting an artificial version of you

If you are going to date for the first time, you will try to make everything extravagant. You would be putting efforts to create a filmy version. In this attempt, you might not remain the real you. You might seem to do a complete look makeover. If not English language friendly, you might speak non-stop terrible English. You might tag yourself as a big-time influencer with a bunch of contacts in hot fields.

In the desperation of getting a ‘yes’, you might paint an entirely different picture of the income status of your family. That is quite a natural phenomenon. We think that we are doing it for our good, which is a serious misconception. The date is not only about the impression game, but it also lays the foundation of a budding relationship nurtured by truth and love. The moment you tend to become artificial, you have successfully created a black hole for the future relationship. So back off from this idea and stay in the real zone.

17. Trying to show off your bank balance

This is the most hated conversation part of any date. Instead of committing this mistake on your first date, know more, show less. That implies that think and discuss more on the radical facets of life rather than going on numbers in your bank account. Be sensitive towards the flow and exchange of emotions. Never try to show off your bank balance.

18. Discussing all your previous relationship(s) 

Why to spoil your present for your never returning past? Ask this to yourself before even starting such a weird conversation. By the end of it, it would be putting both of you in hell awkward positions. Remember, discussing your previous relationships is neither heroic nor will it be decorating your first date with beautiful memories. You never know how it will hit on your dating partner’s perception of you as a lover. So avoid committing this grave first date sin.

The first date is always an experience to remember throughout your life. And no first date is perfect. But just in case, if you really want to get to the moon in the first attempt, this blog may prove to be the turning point of your love life. No guarantees but some of these silly mistakes may be spared in your adventurous first date ever.

What first date mistakes did you make? Write then down in the comment section below for your fellow readers!

Love & Relationships

12 Challenges of Modern Marriage

The institute of marriage has always been an adventure. But in modern times, we have taken this concept way too seriously. We are either on the winning or the losing side. We are not even looking at the grey areas in our relationship. The real meaning of getting married is fading away. The foundations are not appearing as strong as before. And the worst part is we do not have time to realize it and do something about it.

It is highly distressing to see young married couples leading their stressful married lives devoid of any flavour of love and intimacy. Instead, it seems it is full of compromises and repentance. Let us look at some of the major, or say, common challenges of modern marriages.

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1. What if the expectations are too much to handle?

Unlike the old times, marriage brings along a hidden set of expectations of both the parties involved. These expectations are much more than what used to be in your parents’ generation. Revolutionary lifestyle and education might take the blame, but it is now posing a threat to the concept of marriage.

Earlier, the expectations were all about income, household chores, safety, security and love and care. But now, you have become more dependent on your partner to meet your needs to boost your self-esteem. You have set out your own list of the desires for your spouse, which when not met, upsets you to the core. You expect a specific code of conduct from your partner, in and out of your home premises. By planning to share all the responsibilities equally, you unknowingly burden your partners even more. The frustration arising out of it messes our internal equation. There is no harm on depending on your friends and relatives for specific needs.

2. What if you feel unnecessarily motivated to have a lavish wedding?

Modern weddings have turned into a popular business. You have wedding planners all around, selling some lucrative ideas which cover expensive dresses, catering, photography and video making, guest’s favours etc. On top of all this, the other common fancy idea famous these days is the destination wedding. It sounds like the wedding of our dreams. No doubt, you are moved easily by the idea of throwing a fancy event to brag about your shining future. But remember, the wedding is just for a day, marriage is for a lifetime.

The real challenge of modern marriages lies in keeping the love spirits high throughout our partnership. Besides, spending on exploring exquisite places around the world together or expenditures on the betterment of your lives altogether would be a wiser decision than chipping off your life’s savings on just one day.

3. What if the couple needs to live separately due to work reasons?

Our job can be demanding at times. It impacts us in many unspoken ways. The corporate culture makes our decision undeniably hard. The nature or location of work has its consequences on our married life. Due to some job transfers or a new job at a different location, you are required to live a long-distance relationship. They pose a challenge to your marriage as your conversations become texts, phone calls and video chats. You miss enjoying the sexual intimacy at all. When you really want your partner to be by your side, either in times of good news or distress, you feel miserably disappointed.

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4. What if boredom sinks into the marriage?

This is inevitable in every relationship. The more you are used to each other, the lesser you will attract each other. But that does not imply that there is no workable solution for it. When you get bored of eating the same food regularly, you do not discard it forever. You try to change the recipe. Same goes for a relationship. You must plan something to keep your partner interested and happy. Your partner would love to get to see a different ‘You’ at times. Do some crazy stuff. Bring some adventure to your daily routine. And for the record, both the spouses must contribute to making this ride thrilling and engrossed.

5. What if your spouse loves smartphone more than you?

“Look, I have got 400 likes and 150 comments on my post on Instagram”; “Wow! I got my recipe retweeted by 450 people today”. Isn’t this us somehow? Don’t we feel curious to check out what new is happening on our social media account? We remain stuck to our mobile games like every single spare minute. E-commerce websites do other tricks to keep us glued to our smartphones. True that this technology is handicapping us gradually, it is also chewing upon our marriage virtues. Citing it as a challenge of modern marriage would not be an offence.

Today, couples talk less, text more. To fulfil their sexual needs, there is a slight transition from sexual intimacy to pornographic or other adult websites. We get ecstatic about our increasing number of friends or followers online while ignoring the existence of your only companion of this lifetime.

Are married couples even paying attention? Couples should stop living in the virtual world and learn to live in the moment. That is the very least they can do. 

6. What if your ex says hello to you?

All of our generation people have hidden crushes or first loves at some point in our life. First love or first crushes become a lifetime memory. Even when you will get reminded of them after ages, it is the good, happier instances of your relationship that flashes in your mind. The world is a small place to live in. It may happen that you might cross your paths again with your ex. The dead sparks may fly back or not. Point is it might deflect your attention from your current partner for a while. This may begin a chain of lies and deception in your married space. This uncalled intrusion definitely counts as a challenge of modern marriages.

You must mark the distinct line between doable and unacceptable. Do not breach that line for the sake of peace, sanity and sanctity of your marriage.

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7. What if the sexual inclinations lay off the heterosexual norms?

A paradigm shift in mentality regarding sexual inclinations has been seen lately. Though on September 6, 2018, the Supreme Court of India ruled that the application of Section 377 to consensual homosexual sex between adults was unconstitutional & irrational, society has not become an all-inclusive one. The LGBT community still feels locked out in most of the parts of the world our modern age. One always feels shy to walk with partner holding hand-in-hand in public places. They are still highly prone to scrutiny and criticism. Great minds of our society need to imbibe this reality sooner or later. Loving someone is an individual choice. That is not our legal premise to enter. We must celebrate their union as one of our own marriage.

8. What if marriage becomes a 50-50 partnership instead of a total 100 one?

Marriage is a two-way commitment, but it seems we are assigning some of them as “mine” and “yours”. By assuming it to be a 50-50 partnership, we are already setting the limits of our role in our relationship. We are keeping track of our partner’s contribution against ours. Unless they do their job well, we surely hesitate in putting any more efforts to rekindle our bond. This eventually leads to a not-so amicable marriage environment. We will have fights growing uglier by passing days because entitlement would replace love. Instead, we must take the responsible individual to give the best shot for everything we do for a blissful married life.

9. What if live in becomes easy-to-do option than marriage?

As per our modern societal standards, live-in ideology is welcomed as a good sign of progressive society. But there exists a very faint line between the concept of marriages and live-in relationships. Youth is finding the latter a better and comfortable option than being tied with someone for the whole life. People today prefer not to give in into long term commitments. In a live-step, they find it easier to test and walk out, but in a dangerous way, they are tampering the necessary foundation of the concept of marriage.

Marriage changes us as a whole, creating a better and unthinkable person of us. It works upon our attitude, patience, tolerance, discipline, temper and compassion. The live-in concept implies a temporary phase. It gives you dangerous levels of freedom. So, that is a challenge for modern marriage.

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10. What if the happiness of your kids becomes the driving point of your unhealthy marriage?

Coming across a lot more complexities in your marriage, after having kids, is a grave situation. It is no longer an easy decision to go separate ways. You pose an inspirational model to your little champs. You don’t want them to see your marriage crumbling in front of them. Instead, you chose to stay cordially and with as much possible harmony for their so-called happiness. However, your unhealthy equation as a couple will compromise the sound environment a kid needs to learn from. It would somehow impact the kid’s upbringing. They will know marriage as you set it out to them. The flimsy vibe might constitute their mental framework in a similar fashion.

Give your best efforts to either resolve your differences and make peace, or work together to give a congenial environment for your kid.

11. What if the marriage is no more satisfactory enough?

In the times where consumerism has pitched its all-time high and materialistic things have attained utmost importance, the demand-supply ratio is on a steep high rate. You are no longer content with what you have at hand at the moment. You keep craving for some or other things from your partner. Petty complaints persist for a longer time. You tend to overlook the greener aspects of your marriage.

Reaching a satisfaction level has become a nearly impossible task at hand. For that matter, people have started showcasing the brighter facets of their relationship. Show-off has become the new common. In reality, we turn into a pitiful person who either lives in the past or worries too much about our future. Remember, it is an internal fight. You are at war with yourself. You have to get over the petite misconceptions of your mind.

12. What if your baby planning doesn’t get along with your body health?

As per the IMA reports, disease incidence rates have been increasing in the younger aged population. People are diagnosed with infertility or another malfunctioning of body organs, at a comparatively early age of life. Though being a die-hard follower of proper family planning concept, newlywed couples are finding it challenging to adhere to because of some health issues setting in at very early stages of their marriage.

Most couples get diagnosed with infertility issues or some other significant disorders which pre-pones or cancels their chances to have their kids. Since dominant consensus lies with late marriage in the modern concept, people rush into their family planning process or are being diagnosed with other detrimental issues. The couple finds itself in a disheartening and helpless situation. So, this can also be considered as a challenge of modern marriage. 

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However, robust any challenge persists to be; a sturdy marriage will face it fiercely. Do not give in easily. Give the best along with your partner and turn it into a formidable win.

What other challenges do you think modern marriages face? Write them down in the comment section below for your fellow readers!

Love & Relationships Marriage

Advice for Modern Relationships

Recent times are being tricky. It is not just the environmental imbalances we are talking about. Emotional stabilities are at stake. Few examples to count upon like eventful love and relationship zone, which is when we come across people, fall for them, put our heart out for them and then life happens. We soon find ourselves in a tough situation and decide on the easy way out. Now giving it a thought, why are we belittling the mighty love and relationship by throwing it away like this?

We call ‘love’ a complicated entity, which is the absolute lie. Love is a sensation – brings people a lot closer, and rips the worlds and the lives far apart. It has a push and pull of its own. Relationships go right as well as wrong. If infused with loyalty, trust and just the right frequency, love can do the impossible. It has the incredible power of moving people. But if not handled or rather preserved the right way, it might lead you into oblivion. Hence, sharing a few pieces of advice on love and relationships might sound a good idea. 

Relationships in the modern setup

Speaking of the current dating trends, dating rules and habits have changed much in this digital era, and dating behaviour differs much between different set of ages. There is no clear set of rules between dating and being in a relationship. One doesn’t get to see that level of seriousness as compared to our previous generations.

People are following a dynamic lifestyle now, going on and off on their relationship status. Jobs and money have jumped up to number one on their priority list. Time is money. Yes, but true relations are gold as well. Because the bonds we share with our loved ones are intangible assets to us forever. It does not matter whether we get hitched or ditched; the feelings remain. They strengthen us every day, making a better human out of us. Our loved dear and near ones make us worthy and wealthy enough. 

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Value your emotional quotient

In the modern age where feelings have become transient & moreover cryptic, we all need to stop treating feelings as a commodity. Respect because emotions make you human. It is not that true love is a rare find. It is when you stick to your partner even when your world is falling apart. It definitely calls for enormous strength, but that is love. Discuss, commit, respect and support. So far if happening, nothing else matters. 

Make time for your beloved relationship

Time is precious. And God knows, Relations too. Securing time for your loved half is the best dedication you can yearn for. After those exhausting hours of work, the moments shared replenishes your mind and soul. Every time you might unbox a new facet of your soulmate, keeping you wondering how fantastic your choice is. Misunderstandings fail to impregnate your bond. For love and relationship to blossom, make yourself available when your partner needs you. 

Be in a relationship whose consequences you are aware of

 Usually, in the modern dating style, we are usually just seeking a shoulder to lean on, a mind that understands and reverts to us, a faithful listening ear and a person with a good sense of humour to bring big smiles on your faces, even if it is all for a while. The young generation is not seeking out for long term commitments. Either they find it too heavy or much time-consuming.

Casual dating is a new trend. You keep dating a person without even knowing the latter well enough. One must fear that you might stay like this for all your life. You might forever remain confused between what’s right for you and what’s not. Don’t take feelings too casually. It is better to have a stable partner than playing with other’s time and emotions. 

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Avoid any public boasting about a relationship you are not serious about 

Social platforms have their own boons and setbacks. We often use them to update our friends with our knowledge pool, our likes and dislikes, relationship status etc. Even though we date temporarily, we find it apt to show off what kind of cool personality we are by posting photos and exclusive details of our partner. However, we fail to realise that we are sabotaging somebody’s life for worse. So, think and publicise anything responsibly. 

Do not fall for online relationship seeker

Cybercrime is a no-nonsense event these days. Multiple social media accounts are hacked or run by mastermind opportunity seekers who are experts at brainwashing innocent people seeking friends or relationships online. Do not fall for these emotional tantrums easily. Double-check all the personal details as shared by the person in question. Do not share any of your personal data like pictures, videos, contact details, address, bank details, etc. with any unknown on such platforms. You would not even know the consequences of it. Your privacy is in your hands. 

Do not shudder at making bold decisions and stay rock-solid by your partner

Love marriages are not so uncommon these days. Even better, people are proposing live-in relationships to get a better understanding of their to-be. Definitely, one must not see any harm in this thought process. Marriage is a commitment; a life-long commitment. One must be sure enough to go ahead and move rocks. It is not as easy a decision for girls as it is for boys.

In this patriarchal setup, girls can be stereotyped very quickly. Forget about the hymen of the girl; think about her future for once. Now since the old stigmas are shattering, we are looking towards empowered women, self-capable and independent girls who are bold enough to screw the societal norms. 

High time to accept love in all its form

It may be hard to digest for some people, but the truth remains that love has no gender. Society must be inclusive of all sorts of sexual inclinations. Men and women in our community must be encouraged to gather strength and admit to their sexual preferences because love can never bring shame in a world so full of hatred and chaos. Instead, dare to become the best life support your beloved deserves.

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Never stop nurturing your relationship and appreciate every little thing

We all fantasy love birds to be friends first. But when both the partners start taking their feelings and efforts for granted, their very relationship turns into a facade. Value the one meant for you. Keep the sparks flying high even years later. Listen to them. Talk to them. Laugh and cry out even harder. Trust me. There is eternal bliss in those very moments. Don’t let anything creep between you two. Don’t expect life to be too long for this privilege. Make a doable bucket list and start ticking off. Individual goals and principles must be respected. That is where individual space sets in. Time and space make a relationship beautifully long-lasting. 

Keep on holding to your beloved in unfavourable times as well

All said, humans do make mistakes or rather mistaken. When two people belonging to two different worlds come together, significant clashes are bound to occur. They may happen today or some years down the line. But they will happen. Few just give in while others straighten up their minds, take the reins in their own hands and steer it in a new direction supported with some bold moves. People do comment, but does it really matter? Is there anything more important than peace in your life? And especially when we are talking about two precious lives here. Be bold and be brave. People will be embracing you back one day.

Avoid strangulating your relationship by being extra possessive

Try holding the sands in your whole fist. Tighter your hold is, more of it will be getting away from you. This principle is taught to us in our childhood days so many times that it is well inscribed in our minds by now. But what if we forget to apply the same in our real lives? Those simple learnings were meant for our today only. At times, people become so possessive about their partners that it becomes their obsession. They unknowingly start doubting, blaming and hurting mentally as well as physically (in some cases). Once a workshop, your relationship turns into a damn warehouse. There is no more space to breathe in your relationship.

Suffocation leads to death. In other words, by getting way too protective, you are leading your relationship to a dead end, where there is no turning back. So, it is important to believe in your mate and give ample space to bud and blossom even more. 

Do not let your job destroy your personal life

Corporate busy lives is another major challenge faced by couples lately. Lack of time and patience is taking a toll on a significant count of relationships. People are either getting too disheartened to lead their puppet lives anymore or getting too ambitious to take a leap forward, putting their once forever relations at stake. It is a highly disappointing picture for our NexGen humans. Though we cannot bring the old 80’s or 90’s era of subtle life teachings, at least show them how amidst everything love and relationships are so pure and priceless. They must really know that cherished relationships can never be undermined for any reason whatsoever.

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Be warm and welcoming to second chances of love and relationship

There are few relations out of relations, which we casually term as extramarital affairs. As bad it sounds, as worse is the reason for it even to exist. For instance, picky fights between a couple or a couple of misunderstandings leading to saturation or difference of ideologies or goals etc.

Life offers you when you least expect it. Finding your love for the second time is indeed beautiful. But given its due space and respect is expected at the least. You have to move on unless you have other primary concerns such as kids or any health issues of your partner. In such cases, it is tough to decide, but one must not forget that love cannot be substantiated by any cultural or religious bond. Love has its abode deep inside our hearts. It will be there for as long as you wish.

Expectations kill the harmony of any relationship 

Love and relationships without much expectations of returns are the ones which are pure bliss. Selfless love is regarded as a priceless virtue. The kind which we see in dogs, which makes them even more loveable. 

A piece of advice for budding parents

Times have changed. Parents are now no more imposing their decisions or choices on their younger version. They are allowing the kids to make new mistakes every time and learn a step further. These might be life-changing lessons for them. We really appreciate this kind of education. Encouraging your child to be experimental is one of the best and tough decisions. But that is what a genuine parent-child relationship is made of.

Give them open-ended choices. Their independent decisions on handling their relationships must be regarded as well as guarded. Be inclusive of your child’s preferences because, at the end of the day, they are going to look up to you as a model of inspiration. 

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Advice on love and relationships may sound a good read, but it is way more alluring to have the right person beside you, fulfilling the meaning of love in all aspects.

Do you have any advice for modern relationships? Write them down in the comment section below for your fellow readers!


Everything We Need to Know Before We Get Married

There are so many relationship blogs that teach you about marriage and married life. But so few are inspired by real-life events and experiences. In this article, you will learn the many things that everyone should know before getting married. These are things I have learned in my own marriage, and I believe they would be helpful to those about to walk down the aisle and even for already married couples. Preparing for weddings is a lot of work.

First, you have to make the invitations, choose your bridesmaids, and plan for the reception. Then you have to decide what dress to wear, what food to serve, which flowers to get, and who to invite. All these will definitely eat up a lot of your time and energy. Don’t get me wrong. All these are necessary plans to ensure that nothing goes wrong on the day of the wedding. However, couples could get so preoccupied with planning for the event that they forget what really matters. You see, preparing for your wedding is one thing, but preparing for marriage is a whole other story. It requires some work, too! So, below, I have shared some important things to know before the wedding, along with a few tips for getting married.

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1. Shut the doors to your past

If you have a sexual past, any baggage, or meat work, you need not say all those things or open that door to your partner. Leave the past in the past. Ask the universe for support and seek change.

Alternatively, you might come from the other side of the camp and feel completely ambiguous about the wedding night because you are a virgin.

Feeling clumsy and silly is normal, it is easy to think that you will never learn anything. Actually, there is little truth in this; You will always be learning something better to get comfortable in that student seat! But the whole truth is that you have followed God’s design and marriage plans. You are in the perfect place. He will help you; you will learn.

No matter which camp you come into, do not listen to the lies of the enemy who wants to discourage you. Choose to fall in love with your partner. Let your instincts guide you to a greater path.

2. Find out if you accept each other just the way you are

Unless you are living together for some time, there will be some little habits that will come as a surprise for your future spouse. For example, one of you might be a sleepwalker, a sniper, a person who stays on a beer bar for hours or a person who likes to walk around the house naked.

It is always a good idea to introduce your future life partner to these little habits(it can help to make your relationship stronger), so when you stop walking around the house in the middle of the night, they are not suddenly surprised.

3. Understand that respect is above love

Don’t get me wrong. I am not saying love is not important. But there are many cases where the couple likes to live together, even after the love died a long time ago. Or sometimes, you need support to help your children grow or to get financial security.

Once you lose respect for your partner, you will not be able to co-exist. Life becomes constant torture. Their voice annoys your ears. And every time they talk, they get on your nerves. Their touch disturbs the cells in your body. Every encounter is a potential crisis. So, while you can revive lost love, respect is irreplaceable. And that is why respect is always above love.

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4. You must communicate

There is no other place where wives expect their husbands to read their minds like a wedding bed. And you will get to know on your wedding night what kind of hope you have, and it will kick out your body on your own without a lot of input.

The reality of the matter is that you are also learning your own body, so it is not the case that you are expected to give the whole thesis. Just because you don’t know everything about her, it is your first night (even though it is not, it is still the first night under a holy marriage). So you need to start learning to communicate and engage in telling your partner what is happening to you.

And to tell your partner what is happening to you, you also will need to understand what is happening to you. So if it hurts or you want to try something else or if you are sore and want a break for a few hours, let her know, communicate. Don’t shut up, he wants to, and you’re engaged.

5. Marriage offers a learning curve

At the wedding, you will learn a lot about your husband or wife and will be unknowing. As they often say, marriage is the only school where you never graduate, and where you never get a diploma! So, if you are never going to graduate from the College of Marriage, then it means that you are going to learn a lot about the person about which you said: “I do”. So, get ready to become a student in this special school for the rest of your life, because you have a very long ride. Enjoy this marriage life. Fun things to do before you get married; it makes your life change and fills it with happiness.

6.  Learn life skills

Getting married means that at some point, you have to go to your place with your partner and get by standing on your feet. This is the reason why learning newer skills is efficient. Prepare for your wedding by learning how to cook. Also, there is nothing more romantic than sharing homemade food with your spouse. For starters, you can try and learn how to cook each other’s favourite dishes. Learn a new recipe or two or go as far as taking a few cooking classes.

You should start preparing for work at home and preparing for marriage. If you are the type of person, who was raised at home to look after your own belongings, good for you. Otherwise, you should learn how to do laundry, wash dishes, and operate a vacuum cleaner. Marriage is not about spending all your free time cuddling together. It is also about working and running errands. You got to share your work, and you got ready to correct it.

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7. The wedding night is not the end, but the beginning of your life together

The main thing here is that I like to say from this post. You do not have a perfect night of marriage. In fact, most couples will tell you that their wedding night photograph was not right. But they used to love it anyway.

With all embarrassment and minor issues, it was the beginning of their married life, and they did not trade the experience for anything. There is a lot to be thankful for and a lot to look forward to.

Therefore do not exchange to complete bliss and fun. Enjoy the whole day and night and keep in mind that you do not have it. There are thousands of nights to come. You have more time to learn, to grow, to grow. So enjoy this day and night because you only have one wedding night!

8. Money matters matter

A marriage will not survive alone in love. You also have to meet the problems. To be ready for a wedding, both of you should be financially secure. Even before popping up the question, you got to assess how much you earn and find out if it will be enough for your needs as a married couple. Make sure that your monthly salary and savings can pay off not only for the wedding but also the daily expenses after you settle together. Preparing for a wedding also means that you have to learn to handle your finances. You don’t have to keep your money alone, no more you have to pay your dues, pay your share bills, buy groceries from your pocket. Never expect your partner to carry all the costs. If you are not prepared for this way of life, then you are not ready for marriage.

9. Change after marriage

What do we need to change to do this work? No couple is perfect. But that does not mean that after marrying your partner do not need to change anything. For starters, you can try to improve the ways that you handle conflicts. If both of you end up with a quarrel, when a dispute arises, you probably can not take that behaviour to your marriage!

Start with small things like being more responsible for work, remembering little things or being more open with communication. Relationships require frequent changes and improvements, and none of these once ends when you get married.

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10. You will not be the same person after marriage

People keep changing all the time. You fell head on the heels for this person. It’s passionate, energetic carers who wanted to hear, who dreamed big and wanted to change the world. Having continuously been buried under corporate-life wheels for years, marathons after children, and drowning in daily homework, will almost never recognize your partner’s personality. They may be more nervous, less sensitive, more aggressive or less forgiving. They certainly will not be the same person, and you need to come up with a new version of yourself and your partner. Otherwise, your life will be unbearable.

11. It’s not all about sex

Real intimacy in marriage is not about sex only. It is about connecting mental, emotional, spiritual in all areas. Hopefully, you are joining all these other areas before your wedding night. Work on making friendships during engagement and courtship because it is engaging in other areas that make sex beautiful.

Sex is like eating and drinking. Everyone knows that, but only some people think that everyone can live on the same food. Kids meal is more than enough for some people. But some people do not feel full before eating an entire family meal. This happens with sex also, do not expect your partner to have the same hunger with you. If a partner is hungry, then he can become a betrayal. You need to communicate your feelings, needs and concerns; otherwise, you will be stuck in a bull ass relationship.

12. Be friends before lovers

Lastly, I want to say if you want your partner to stay with you throughout your life, then you have to treat her like your best friend. One day, many years from now, when the cyclone of emotion, intimacy, the growth of children and the way to work, you will return and reflect on your marriage path. You will have a lot of time to spend together. If the hours pass in the form of eternity and you have nothing to say, then you are not friends in your whole life. Friendship is the glue that binds the couple together — all the way to the end.

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Final Thoughts On the Subject

These are just some things that you have to know before you get married. It seems that you have got a lot of work to do, but if you do it together with your partner, it will not be so difficult. Be motivated to each other and be prepared to move forward. It can serve as an assistant guide for all the lovely couples, who will soon be married. I hope you have a smooth transition from the dating phase to the married phase of your relationship. Best wishes to you and may you have the best married life ahead!

What did you wish you knew before getting married? Write it down in the comment section below for your fellow readers!

Love & Relationships

Signs You Are Ready For A Long Distance Relationship

Many times couples involved in relationships face hard times at some point. This is the testing phase of their relationship where they would either survive or just break up. While some couples try to mend things, some mutually decide to part ways. Breakups can be heart-breaking be it in the long term or short term relationship. But that’s how it is, and we all have to accept it.

We all want to stay close to our partners and live with every moment with them. However, it’s not possible for many couples as they have to maintain a long distance relationship. This usually happens when you and your partner are living in different cities or different countries. And this situation doesn’t arise only because of the work; it might be due to your family, your studies and anything else. This is one of the most challenging phases of your relationship. Long-distance relationships are a bit tricky and tough to handle than regular ones. But that doesn’t mean you can’t.

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Embracing the Distance When in a Long-Distance Relationship

There’s a wonderful saying, “If you want to live together, you first need to learn how to live apart.” Sounds a bit filmy, right?

Living together with your beloved is very easy, but living separately from your partner is the most challenging thing to do.

It might be difficult for both you and your partner to stay apart. At one point, you will feel angry, frustrated, also cry like a baby, feel lonely because you can’t see your beloved for days. But a little bit of patience can work out best for you. But it all works out if you and your partner are ready to take it up as a challenge and fulfil it successfully. If you only see positive things in this, you and your partner can live like this for several years and still be happy as ever. In fact, before your wait comes to an end to be together, your partner will be with you.

You can’t expect things to be as normal as they were before all of a sudden immediately after you both start living separately. Initially, situations will be difficult. You won’t stop missing your partner. Give it some time and then see how things work out. Getting emotional for every little thing will make your partner emotional, too. You both might get frustrated. Don’t let that happen.

Now a lot of things are involved in such kind of relationships. One is the situation where both you and your partner are already in a long distance relationship since you started dating. Or it may be when one of you moves to a different city or country for studies or work. So if you’re already staying apart since the beginning, it won’t be that difficult. But after being together for several years and meeting each other every day, this situation can be a bit challenging.

Well, in such a situation, opting for a long distance relationship is a huge step. Things can change suddenly, and you will come to know where your relationship is heading to.

So before deciding to take this step, there are several signs which you might come across. This will make you understand whether you’re ready for it or not. You’ll ask several questions to yourself if you are prepared for it or not? If it’s worth taking a risk? If you can trust your partner for this? Will this work out? If you’re ready for it, then you’ll try to figure out solutions to make it work out. It’s necessary to find answers to these questions, and that’s when you are good to go ahead.

Even once you decide for it, you or your partner might give it a thought again. That’s when you start losing your confidence. Never let this happen. In such a situation, you just need to move ahead and never look back or regret it. You should just stop thinking about it and focus on the positive things. Try to create a joyous atmosphere around your partner. Think that it was one of the best decisions you and your partner ever made for each other.

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Here are some of the signs which indicate that you are ready to stay apart from your beloved yet together:

1. You don’t feel the need to be with each other all the time

This is one of the important signs you are ready for a long distance relationship. It can be beneficial for you and your partner. Even if you’re staying close by and you don’t feel the need to be with each other all the time, this is a great sign to opt for long distance relationship. If you and your partner are independent enough, then you’re definitely ready for it. This is a major sign of maturity which both you and your partner have, and it can help you a lot. Even if you are staying apart, you can survive, live a normal life and enjoy it.

2. Both of you have excellent communication skills

Another most important sign you are ready for a long distance relationship is communication. Communication is vital in any relationship to keep it going. If there’s no communication, it can lead to various problems and misunderstandings too. Sometimes, you may end up losing your beloved. Well, both of you can survive a long distance relationship happily if you are good at communication. Constantly being in touch with each via phones, messages and video calls is the best way. Telling your minutest problem to your partner, discussing your feelings can help you both. Making your partner feel secure both mentally and physically through communication can work wonders. Whenever in doubt, just grab your phone and talk it out. Never hesitate to express yourself and your opinions to your partner. You never know your biggest problems can be solved in minutes by your beloved.

3. When you both expect the same things

Maintaining a long distance relationship should be a mutual decision. If it’s a forced one, it may not survive for a long time. You or your partner may end up feeling lonely, and that’s when you will have to break up. There will be lots of blame games in such a situation. So, this will only work if both will have the same goals and know what you expect from each other. This is the driving force, and both will be taking the same efforts to make it work out. So, if both of your expectations are the same, this is a clear sign you are ready for a long distance relationship.

4. No comparison with other relationships

Not all relationships are the same and go through the same problems as you do. Comparing your relationship with others can invite problems for both of you. It’s like you’re considering others’ relationship superior to yours. There are many who don’t have to stay apart and live a happy life. But if you have to do it, then don’t compare it with others. It will simply make you frustrated, and you won’t be happy. You might feel lonely during special days, but that should stop you from living a happy life. You can’t always have things that others have. If you get to pass through this phase, it’s a sign that you are ready for a long distance relationship.

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5. You’ve immense faith and trust in each other

This is one of the major factors that play a vital role when a couple decides to go a long distance relationship. Loyalty is paramount in every relationship, and that is what keeps two people together. When you love someone, you blindly trust your partner for everything. You can only decide to go for a long distance relationship when you both don’t have any trust issues. Make each other realize how much you both trust each other.

6. Understanding that physical relationship is only one of the many aspects that keep two people together

Dating someone is not only about roaming around, watching movies, shopping, going on fancy lunch and dinner dates or exchanging gifts. It involves many other aspects which make you want to be with your beloved for the rest of your life. One of the important factors which play a vital role in binding two people together is physical intimacy. Once you start experiencing this, you will feel like you’re living in a world of dreams. But once you go on a long distance relationship, this won’t be possible.

This will be one thing which you both will miss the most. Well, emojis and smileys can never replace the soft kisses, cuddles and hugs. But if you get through this and understand that it is one aspect that keeps two people together, you’ll never face any problems. No matter how far you and your partner are, but you’ll still feel close to each other. Considering this particular aspect and acting with maturity is a clear sign you are ready for a long distance relationship.

7. You don’t mind spending time with other people

For many couples, it’s all about being together with each other all the time. It’s like they can’t get enough of each other and they want to live in their sweet world. They don’t want to lose any chance to be together. These types of couples simply don’t want to dedicate their time to their friends and family. For them, social life doesn’t exist. It’s like you can’t enjoy anything without your partner. If you or your partner is like this, then you can’t survive a long distance relationship.

But with some people, they seem to be pretty independent. They don’t mind socializing and having fun in their way with friends and family. They like to give themselves some time and do stuff alone. Such people take out time by engaging in new hobbies, partying, travelling alone or with friends and family and live a happy life. This type of approach can be beneficial for such couples. They can easily live two different lives and enjoy them. If you’re ready for this, then go ahead with it. When both you and your partner have no issues living such a life, it is a major sign you are ready for a long distance relationship.

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8. You have a strong bond with your family and friends

There are many couples who are always in their zone once they start dating. For them, it’s all about being with each other. It’s like you don’t need your family or friends since you have your partner. However, in such circumstances, if either you or your partner decide to go for a long distance relationship, it will be tough for you both. But if you’re good at maintaining friendly relations with your family and friends and have a social life, it will help you survive. After all, they are the ones who will be supporting you in your difficult times when your partner is away from you. Also, it won’t make you feel lonely since you have your near and dear ones with you. If you realize this, it will be pretty easy for you to spend those years with your partner.

Long Distance Relationships Are Equally Healthy and Normal

There are many couples who refrain from taking this step, thinking that things won’t work out for them. However, if you focus on the positive signs and mentally prepare each other, things might work out. There’s nothing big deal about it, and many couples are successfully handling long distance relationships. Some opt for the same even after being married, and kids and they are one happy family.

These days, many couples across the world are ready to give a long distance relationship a try. In such cases, both the partners are ready for it, and they equally extend their support. Being in a long distance relationship is not a compulsion, but when the need arises, there is no harm in doing it. It might be for a short term or long term, depending on the situation. However, things tend to change during this particular period. So, you and your partner should accept and welcome that change and continue to live.

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The above-mentioned points are the clear signs that you’re good to go to handle a long distance relationship. You will see all these signs only when you attain a certain level of maturity in yourself. Being childish won’t work for you and your partner. So folks, take the right step at the right time.

What are your thoughts on long distance relationships? Write them down in the comment section below for your fellow readers!

Love & Relationships

Married Couples – Things Every Married Couple Can Relate to

Grihastha is undoubtedly the most rocking of all the four phases of life. Coming from a happy-go-lucky phase, it is more like welcoming a revolution in life, for a better cause. The love sparks are everywhere. Sun, stars, moon all seem to start communicating to you. Two people have bonded with each other willfully to be buoyantly in love with each other, going distances to carve out a better life together. From here on, two people are sharing the same set of dreams, outlook and wishes. It sure sounds like a fun ride ahead. There are a plethora of things that can be related when you are a married couple. Following are some of the relatable things that only married couples can understand.

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You have nothing called personal any more

If you used to be a person with reservations, it is a tidal wave in your life. Gone are the days when you would be secretive and hiding all the time. You happily open that room to your spouse. “Mine” turns into “ours”. Your feelings and things have apparently two owners now. Your joys and sorrows get to be mingled with others now.

You are growing mutually

One must remember Yin and Yang concept which describes how opposite or contrary forces may actually be complementary and interconnected, and how they may give rise to each other as they interrelate to one another. The same theory applies to married couples as well. They might be of different structure or stature, but both complement each other in unthinkable ways. You get to see many of your friends, post-marriage, getting changed to a far better version. It is like they have been inoculated for life. Love really makes wonders happen.

Priorities are switched for good

After marriage, your dreams are not only yours anymore. Both will take measures to contribute their best to make each other a happy, radiant and content person. Both of you would ensure special celebrations for special days. None of you would leave any stone left unturned to arrange for bigger and better surprises. If you’re not much into creativity, you will make sure that your spouse needs not to worry and you are there to handle her bucket list.

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Responsibilities are shared

Marriage is called an enormous responsibility for no-nonsense. Both the partners involved share equal responsibility of standing by love, honesty, hardships and loyalty. The household chores like cooking, cleaning, taking care of kids and after school activities etc. are well divided to relieve each other of extra workloads. On odd days, they would be considerate towards sharing even more.

You have two families to care and thank for

Marriage is not just two people getting together; it is two families getting married. More the people, merrier life becomes.

You have got a friend for life

Marriage would be dull without a friendship between couples. You need to have that connection where you know your spouse through and through — laughing out loud, crying together, cracking similar jokes, hanging out at your hot spots, sharing the same level of insanity, playing random pranks and doing some other crazy stuff. This means you have a 24*7 entertainer staying by your side. You develop this special connection in a gradual course of time.

You perform as a team

Every single thought or act affects the married couple as a whole. Decisions, trivial or significant, are made by consensus. In times of despair, you have somebody to cheer you up, comfort you and appreciate your achievements. There is somebody to lean on, somebody to take the fall for you. You enjoy being the partners in crime. If the team plays well, it stays well.

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You are becoming good at compromises

In order to have an everlasting marriage, it cannot be a win-win solution always for both the partners. Either of them has to bend at times for the sake of spouse. Actually, it is not even a loss to anyone because such small acts give a surplus amount of joy in return. You put your loved one before yourself. One understands that it is always better to bend a bit rather than breaking the beautiful relationship. The choice becomes yours. Mere apologies and forgiveness add life and strength to your bond of love.

Nobody knows about your partner better than you

Apparently, you are the one now who has seen the best and worst of your partner. You know how to fix things for your mate and what is to refrain likewise. Both of you get to know each other’s likes and dislikes in food preferences, movie genres, clothing style, books, sports etc. Be it shopping or career; you are the best one to guide what is apt for your bae and what isn’t.

Dog and catfights may sound to be routine

Any balance needs bad things to co-exist with the good stuff. There are moments when arguments blow out of proportion. Some silly act or mistake and the house goes on fire. It is almost there in every marriage, irrespective of being love or arranged. The blame game, reminding each other’s faults and discussion on buried incidents popping out of nowhere is no big deal anymore. Yet it survives for not too long. Either of them takes a mammoth initiative to put off the fire. Every single time, people start becoming creative, bringing in new ideas to impressively handle and apologies to their mate because, at the end of the day, it is the love and laughter that matters in life. As time passes on, we would find all these fights silly and would be laughing hard on those memories on sharing them with the kids.

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The circles of the married couple are intersecting

You must be having a friend or colleague circle of your own but post-marriage, you get to enter the circle of your spouse as well and likewise happens with your partner. You need to entertain them as and when required. It is fun meeting a new set of people and getting to know about the quirky side of your mate. This way, we get to solidify our bond even more.

The married couples feel devoted to each other in many ways

There stands a very bleak line between live-in relationships and marriage. Unlike the former, when you are wedded to each other, a distinct feel of responsibility sinks in. It seems like you two belong to each other and cannot let any petty thing shatter your gleeful space. You are out of the comfort zone of making easy decisions. Besides, you are accountable to lot many people around you, including your kid(s), if any. You no longer feel righteous to make quick decisions at instances of desperation at the cost of haemorrhaging your marriage.

Expectations to create your own legacy builds up

Few months of marriage and people around you start coercing you to conceive and get baby. Though happy in your own paradise and still in the process of getting to know your partner, you start struggling with ways to face these not-so- wanted anxieties dwelling in unoccupied minds. Such hilarious pressures often intrude your private space. It is always up to married couples to decide about their family planning. Suggestion and advice are warmly welcomed, but perpetual curiosity is bothersome. However, undeterred of any such thing happening around, the married couple keeps on enjoying their own space, living the life we-don’t-care size.

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You turn into a wanderlust person

There is a long things-to-do list which every married couple aims to fulfil. There is a whole lot of fantasies whirling around when you are with your person. You put efforts to create magical moments to be cherished forever. You start working on your savings and the right planning. Nothing can beat the two-some time while exploring new places together. You become so ecstatic about travelling together. It is exhilarating to know more about each other. At times, the ambience makes you fall in love with each other all over again. You get additional quality time to spend with your partner. You are into adventurous rides, cultural learnings, uncalled shopping and delectable dining, all with your one and only. This romantic share of time is extremely precious and dreamy to the married couples.

Striking balance between professional and personal life is a task

Dealing with the corporate culture, married couples are coping up with meeting deadlines and delivering quality. They are hardly able to spare time for each other. They desperately try not to bring work to bed. And it is imperative to nourish your intimacy. People are losing minds at work and bringing the stress back home. When you are in bed, you are either extremely exhausted or deeply frustrated, which leaves no space of sound conversation with your spouse. You might be struggling enough, but you know the importance of getting over it. Stakes are very high, and time is irreversible. Your love with your partner gives you enough justification to make yourself available for whatever manageable time you get to spend with each other.

You become the protector of your realm

You would want to treasure your person above everything. So, you become too protective of each other. You won’t sit back and watch your loved one suffer even minimally. That is the unforeseen power of love. You become one kickass partner for life.

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On a lighter note, there are some funnier aspects as well, which generally a married couple can very well relate to:

1. Personal Space

Husband expecting a morning tea, which is when he realizes his wife prefers to be in DND and let-me-sleep morning zone.

2. Diplomacy

Wife wants an honest husband at home, but not at public spaces. You can’t point any single mistake of your wife’s in public.

3. In-laws

In terms of in-laws treatments, the wife always expects payback from a husband with equal intensity. A bumper rewind radio mode will be switched on if you fail to do so.

4. Fights

They literally find a reason, at typically every inch of the house, for both of them to fight and argue. For example, a petty TV or AC remote, kitchen menu, wardrobe spaces, getting on the driving seat or even the sides of the bed to sleep. Even a piece of news on TV or any scene of the movie might spike arguments, going from nowhere to somewhere and ultimately everywhere.

5. Kids

Bunch of conflicts arise while handling a kid, though wanting the best for the kiddo. Husbands creating disasters, if told to handle toddlers or kids on their own, even if it is for, chuck the hours, minutes.

6. Presents

It is not crucial whether wife remembers or not, husbands might be doomed for missing out the special dates of the year-round. But everything gets compensated with gifts and planned surprises. This makes up for everything.

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7. Mess

Wet towels on the bed, uncovered food in the kitchen, socks in the living area floor, things kept way out of their fixed territory etc. induce daily fights but hell no on distinct improvisations.

8. Shopping

Either of them might hate intense shopping, but it does not matter when your partner has to. The level of scrutiny in every single thing makes you look sorry for your body and mentally crib for food and rest.

9. Insults

They can call a plethora of names to each other but dare anybody who tries to defame them in person in any manner.

Every Married Couple is the Same

After reading this, you might have realised that married life has its ups and downs. But overall, it is a fun ride. And the best is, everyone has the same experiences. You might have lost count of the times husbands have complained about their wives controlling them. Similarly, millions of women think their husband’s TV habits are annoying. This tells you that you are not alone. Every marriage is the same one way or another. That is the beauty of relationships. And as far as marital relationships are concerned, the couple who stays together slays together.

What are some things you think every married couple can relate to? Write it down in the comment section below for your fellow readers!

Love & Relationships

How to Survive a Breakup – Embracing the Solo Life

When Titanic was sinking, we all were hoping so badly that Jack and Rose would be surviving in the end with their children cooing and playing somewhere in the daisy fields. Screw the real story or the fiction. We did not want to see anything else. This is us when it comes to heartbreak and you need to figure out how to survive a breakup.

We so wish our lives to be lead like a movie with the most usual happy endings. We are a set of weak-minded creatures, carrying a whole chunk of sentiments loaded in our minds. But looking at the greener side, emotions make us passionate. They make our lives surreal. We bond with each other, create love story never heard of, share our heart and soul with our better half. After all, not to forget, we are human beings. We are meant to do this.

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Going Away from Your Soulmate

To be honest, it is an honour to meet your soulmate in one lifetime. That soulmate need not be perfect, but somebody who is just the right person for you. The chief recipe of a relationship is primarily ‘trust.’ Trust gives a-go-go to all sorts of constants such as friendship, love, and a future. But when this string is pulled off, the blackout is unbearable. The pain is the next level. It is like as if a flower has lost its fragrance or a clock has come to a still. You seem to have lost the essence of your life at once. Your future appears so very bleak. It is, nonetheless, a personal apocalypse for you.

You become so numb and hopeless. But even worse, you become desperate to go back to your ex and revive it all again. Asking your ex for what went wrong, beg for forgiveness and request to come back to square one. That is where you lose the remaining of your self-esteem. Now, that is not just unacceptable, but highly despicable.

How to Survive a Breakup

Let us discuss specific guiding tips on how to survive a breakup in rather constructive ways:

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Acceptance is key

Though the relationship had hit the rocks, you keep on struggling through its days and nights. Your life starts running in a single loop. You are stuck in your own gloomy space. You downgrade your worth, disappoint your family members who really care for you and hurt them in return. Now considering a pragmatic approach, you must know for once that the universe works in a collaborative way. It definitely wants the good for you.

Nature gives us signs in disguise. Our human eyes cannot see the curtailed message behind it. It can only be perceived by a sound mind. Whatever happens, happens for a good reason, always. It stands correct in this case as well. We need to stand still and wonder why your friends and family still stand with you in your difficult times and thank them relentlessly. Strengthen yourself, drop regrets and accept. You did no wrong. You only loved. So you deserve no more tears ahead.

Don’t blame yourself, think of your dear ones instead

People generally enter into an isolated zone where they can accuse and torture themselves. They believe whatever happened, it was because of them. Even unacceptable, people become homicidal. They think it to be the only way to get away this. Even thinking of suicide is a big no. This might be the worst nightmare for your dear ones. Just imagine the life-long pain you would inflict on them and for what, a person who did not even love you. There can’t be anything more absurd than this. This most stupid act of yours would shatter your family who has nourished you and survived a good bunch of tantrums.

The fault might be in your stars, but definitely not you. If you are so much broken within, then it shows how amazingly you loved that person. If two people are honestly and mutually in love, then they will not let any excuses to peep in between them. They will override any grim situation. They would stay by each other, holding hands till the very end. However, that is not the case when you are grieving on your separation all alone. That person never loved you. Process this thought. Love was blind because you were way too honest with your feelings.

Instead of becoming a submissive person, think what else went wrong earlier, which you didn’t notice before. Surely you would be able to put fragments in place. These things will make you even more vigilant, stable and mature as a person.

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Back to routine business

This one is the easiest part you can play. Don’t discuss your break up with your friends on a repetitive basis. Plan an outing with your friends or family at once to any place of your choice, preferably less crowded spots. Engage yourself into something productive. And do so quite aggressively. Focus. Pursue your hobbies even more. Spend considerable time with your parents. Listen to their stories and experiences. Give them hands in their routine affairs. Socialize with your well-wishers. Spend more time amidst nature. Avoid immersing yourself into drinking barrels and smoking habits.

Chugging down alcohol and smoking a ton of cigarettes would only worsen your condition. Keep distance from negative criticism at this moment. Hang out more often with the best people of your life because the kind you need is who holds your hand and uplifts your spirit to extract you from this depressing phase. Attend some group sessions where people generally share and hear each other. Listen to a few inspirational monologues. Watch movies and shows of your preferred genre. If you have been winning accolades in your job, try to get even more. If you are yet to prove your metal, now is the time. Do whatever makes you happy and free.

Buy time before getting into another relationship

You might have been separated from your ex, but the trauma might still be haunting you at times. You are not emotionally ready to start a new relationship so soon. Sometimes, a warm hug from somebody or quite affectionate words, in our frail times, do drift us an inch closer to that person. We don’t even realize that happening. Being the sentimental species we are, we get swayed easily. Now that is the time where one quickly get hold of you. Stay cautious. A freshly broken heart is easy prey. Better not to seek out a new relationship too early.

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Revenge mode is a waste

Rage follows wreckage. Your mind must be warmed up with outrageous things. You start planning for something as vicious as it can be. In return, you are in the process of disgracing yourself. You must disembark yourself from such heinous set of thoughts. Your thoughts call for the same kind of vibe from the universe. In order to make peace with your mind, reach out to all productive resources. Be it people, things or acts. Retribution takes you nowhere. Don’t scar yourself for some worthless fellow.

Stop sneaking into your ex’s social media accounts

Undoubtedly, it is very tempting to know the whereabouts of your ex. You want to know whatever is going on in their life. It is because you still feel connected to the person. You have to let go of this feeling first. Take a strict resolution and block your ex from all of your accounts. There is no time to look back now. It is over, for all good.

Be grateful

Be thankful to the universe who showed you the right way at the right time. The acts of God are unquestionable. You could have never known the consequences, had the two of you have not separated. Be grateful to those who, if anyone ever, had dropped warnings regarding your fateful relationship with the ex. Sometimes, our dearest people can see what our eyes can’t.

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Hopes must not die

Someone has indeed said that “Death of hopes is the death of life.” So, for your dear life, keep the hopes burning. Love does exist. It is just that bad comes easy. Goodness takes time. So, gather yourself and be open to all the opportunities life gives you. If you find somebody tickling your heart again, give your heart a second chance to love and live. No need to rush into anything, take your time. You might shudder at once but remember, at the end of the day, we all need someone to plant a kiss of love on our forehead, wishing us goodnight with sweetest dreams. So brace whatever is coming your way, with brains at work as well.

Meditate & rejuvenate

if you are feeling useless or meaningless, with no energy left to deal with the world, come closer to yourself. And there is no better way of doing this without meditation. Meditation is an art of living in resonance with your inner self. Amp up your confidence level. Develop a habit of meditating once or twice a day daily. If this routine been followed religiously, you are most probably on the way to build a rational and affable mind. More you meditate, more is the serenity and wisdom, you are welcoming in life.

Focus on shaping your career

Caring all about your romantic affair will never lead you anywhere. Work on developing a secure foundation of your life. A bright career prospect gives you strength in unimaginable ways. Your career not just enriches you but hundreds or thousands of them, benefitting from your service or product. The clock will continue ticking, and you would be scaling new heights, delivering even better and your income likewise. A job brings along a whole lot of admiration and respect. And if wise men are to be trusted, jobs are the best kind of useful distractions.

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Special considerations for the divorced or to-be-divorced couples

When you are going through a rough patch in your marriage, you give it significant time for things to normalize. But when repetitively failed, apparent thought would be separation. Though divorce counts to be the extreme most step in one’s life, it might be the best alternative for keeping up with the sanity & peace of mind and soul. But it needs a thorough reconsideration when you have kids in between. Depending on their mental age, it is tough to predict and assume their tolerance level.

In a society filled with narrow mindsets, you need to discuss your situation with them. Make them understand the importance the decision makes on your family culture. Take them into your confidence. Regarding their custody, leave the decisions to them if they are big enough to understand the consequences. Let them meet their parent whenever they wish too. Make sure that the couple has separated, not the parents. If one of the parents seems to be least interested in kids affairs, single parenting or second marriage would be the happier options. Build up more confidence and high spirit for your kiddo’s sake. Their future is partially in your hands. So instead of lamenting, remember the smile and affection of your kid.

Break-ups are never easy to deal with. It calls for tons of courage. But believe me, once you are done with it, you will treat the episode as the best lesson gained in life.

How do you survive your breakups? Write it down in the comment section below for your fellow readers!

Love & Relationships

Breaks in Relationship: Are They Normal?

Dating has become a quite casual thing for people in today’s time. While everything feels like a dream in the early days, things can go hunky-dory at some point. That is the testing times for both the girl and the boy. Some survive this, while some simply give up thinking that is the best way to deal with it. But couples nowadays have come up with another solution instead of just walking out from a relationship. Well, that is the best thing one can opt for without going through emotional and mental stress. Instead of breaking ties with their loved ones, they believe in taking a break from their relationship for a while.

“We were on a break!”

Now while saying this, the first thing which comes to my mind is Ross and Rachel from FRIENDS. Well, not just me, but almost everyone who is reading this. For all those who don’t know, I recommend you to watch FRIENDS, and I am sure you will be able to relate to this situation. Having said all this, I think taking a break from your relationship has become quite common among couples. Also, one shouldn’t make a big deal out of it, as it is a personal choice of the couple.

So before jumping on to the pros and cons of having relationship breakups, let me tell you what does relationship breaks means. So basically, when a relationship between two people is going through a rough phase, that’s when instead of breaking up, they take a break from each other. Separating from each other for a while will give them time to think about themselves and also figure out how to deal with the problems. Breaks in relationship can also be very hurtful, but one needs to take this step at the right time to lead a happy life ahead.

But as we all know, nothing is as easy as we think as there are lots of factors to be considered before taking this step. It is a huge step as it will either make or break your relationship forever. Plus, one will go through mental and emotional stress, too in this sensitive time.

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Here are some pros of having breaks in relationship, which can be favourable for many couples:

1. Giving yourself time apart

No one would want to stay away from their beloved, but sometimes the situation demands to do so. Taking breaks in relationship will lessen your burden. When you are in a relationship, you have to put efforts to make your relationship work constantly. But when you take a break, it is all about you and no one else. You will get a lot of time to think just about yourself. You can indulge in things you love, be it travelling, exploring new things about yourself and also your hobbies. Well, in many cases this break thing might work out best.

2. Learning to value your partner

We all are selfish at some point in our life and just think about ourselves. The same happens when you are dating someone. For some people, this habit of being selfish can create problems in a relationship. The other person might get hurt, feeling that you don’t love them anymore. This can be one of the reasons for relationship breaks. However, once you’re away from your beloved even for a while, you might just realise the importance of that person in your life. You will feel your life is incomplete without that person, and this realisation is enough to mend things.

3. Getting your life on track

While you are in love, sometimes, a person forgets about their future. This happens when you’re too much involved in your relationship. Life can be like a fairytale, a dreamy and beautiful one, but one also has to be practical. No one is going to feed you for free. Career is as vital as love, and both should have a perfect balance. If you feel you have lost your way career-wise, a short break from your relationship can work wonders as you get to plan things for your future. There is no distraction, and you can be more focused. In short, your goals might get a clear vision.

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4. Testing your love and becoming stronger

Staying away from your beloved can be the hardest thing one has to go through. But a little pain in love can make things work out. While one can take things for granted but distancing yourself from your beloved will make you realise how much you love your partner. In fact, it will make you much more confident about your relationship than before. A small break in a relationship can get you a lifetime of happiness.

5. Realising the importance of communication

When there are breaks in relationship, things tend to cool down between the two people. As the couple is on a break, they behave quite formally with each other. This makes things easier for both of them. The effect of communication becomes smoother. They have the patience to listen to each other without as now they are two different individuals and not a couple for the time being. Taking a break gives them a chance to listen, respect and understand each other’s point of views patiently rather than fighting over it.

Well, there might be many other benefits of taking breaks in relationships. However, with some pros, there are also cons, which the couple faces during their time apart. But before we get into those, in my opinion, there should be some relationship break rules that are needed to be followed to make this situation easier to handle, making it more effective.

In my opinion, or I guess many other couples who sincerely want to make things work out with their partner, the most important thing to remember is that it is a temporary break and not a permanent one.

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So when is it wrong to have relationship breaks:

1. Seeing other people 

Well, this is the most common thing which can actually destroy relationships. While you are on a break, it doesn’t give you a right to date or thinking about seeing other people. Because you still haven’t wholly parted ways from your partner. But most of the times, the other person makes the mistake of looking out for others and eventually lose interest in mending things with their partner. This might end things.

2. Moving on too soon

Having a relationship break means to distance yourself from your partner to gain some perspective. However, if your partner takes this temporary break as a permanent one and moves on quickly, that is the end. It simply means, he/she doesn’t need you in his/her anymore and you’re a closed chapter. While the other partner is waiting for things to work out, but if you’ve moved on, the other person will feel cheated.

3. Making breaking up easier

While we figured out a lot of pros of having relationship breaks, for some couple, this whole idea of breaks in a relationship can turn worse. Things might simply become too complicated to handle. The loss of communication, the feeling of love and emotion might probably vanish away. Sometimes separation makes them so rigid that they tend to move on without thinking about their partner. Some people don’t prefer to walk the same path once they change their direction. They just want to get rid of it and end it forcibly. Taking such a huge step might prove favourable for oneself, but this might also make the situation worse for the other partner.

4. Not specifying the parameters for the break

Relationships have no guarantee since they are not any objects. It is an emotion which one feels, and it needs to be nurtured so that it can grow. A relationship involves two people to make it work, and both of them will have to put equal efforts to make it successful. But when it hits the rocks, it is time to take the right step. While people these days choose to find a mid solution of taking relationship breaks, however, that too doesn’t come with any guarantee. So it should be decided mutually. The risk factor is very high as there are chances you might lose your loved one forever. Also, one will regret for the rest of their life for taking this decision.

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5. Not specifying the period

When a couple decides to take a relationship break, one doesn’t know how much time it will take for things to get sorted. While the other one has already settled on a specific period needed to sort out things, this can create a rift between the two. So for example, if the girl thinks she needs barely 3 to 4 months or a short term period to work things out, whereas the boy wants a year or so for the same. There is a lot of difference in opinion which might eventually end things. Also, the patience level plays a significant role while the couple is on a relationship break. Once you lose patience, things won’t work out.

Relationship Breaks Are a Matter of Choice

So getting into a relationship is no big deal, but dealing with it as years pass by is an enormous task. Sometimes your partner can be tough to deal with, but if you love him/her, you will anyhow find ways to see the positive side rather than counting the negative things.

Breaks in relationships is a new-age concept which we have seen in movies and TV shows, but now people are indulging into it in real life as well. I’ve personally seen a lot of my friends going through this, too. While some were successful and are now happily back together, unfortunately, the others experienced heartbreaks.

Breaks in relationship taken in the search for a positive outcome are good breaks

Nowadays, people are very open-minded and like trying out different things, especially when it comes to dealing with relationships. Some couples will put their heart and soul to make their relationship work and keep their love blossoming. For such couples, breaks in relationships are the best option when they face some issues. While for people who indulge in casual relationships and dating, this might not be a suitable option. Also, if they decide to go for it, relationship break rules don’t apply to them because everything is causal for them.

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Relationship breaks can work wonders for those people who take this step at the right time and sincerely follow the rules set by them. One has to do this without hurting their partner and making sure things are going well. During this period, one can discover several new things about oneself and also about their partner. Comparing stuff about how they were before and after can also help.

Breaks in relationship are good when they are are not habitual

Well, this concept of breaks in relationships can be favourable, but one must not make it a habit of repeating it several times. Because you never know, things might have worked in your favour once; however, it can’t be the same every time. Though people these days are taking such things very casually and not making a big deal out of it, one must not take advantage of it. Feeling ashamed of revealing it to your friends and family about the same is something wrong. It is one’s way of dealing with a relationship, and everyone should be respected for it. Being judgmental can affect the person going through this, and he/she might lose confidence.

Also guiding our fellow friends and loved ones in this situation can help them as well us. One can be prepared for it in case a need might arise in the future.

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Well, these were some of the useful opinions on breaks in relationship, which can change your views before taking such a big step. There is nothing wrong in doing it, but one should be very careful in such sensitive matters. Having said that, these views apply to all kinds of relationships, be it a man in love with a man or a woman loving another woman, and there is nothing wrong about it.

Love & Relationships

15 Facts About Lesbian Relationships That Everyone Must Know

Feelings and emotions have no boundaries. Same goes with love, which is a beautiful feeling which is beyond your control. When I talk about love, that doesn’t only mean a relationship between a man and a woman. There can be love between two best friends, father-son love, mother-daughter love, brother-sister love and many more. Apart from that, there are some relationships which are as beautiful and pure as they can be, which I mentioned earlier. Here I’m talking about love between a woman and a woman. It is also termed as lesbian love, or this kind of relationship or feeling is known as lesbianism. Yes, that is right.

Lesbian – it is a pretty commonly heard word these days across the world and now in India as well. While gay relationships are being slowly accepted by Indians, lesbianism isn’t accepted that much. However, we can’t be judgmental about this as it can be your personal choice. We all are living in 2019. Evolution is taking place in everything, and it is time that we too try to change and accept it. We should be more sensitive towards addressing these things. All of us deserve love, regardless of who it comes from. India is on its progressive mode and has started to adapt and accept this type of culture and the concepts. Hence, couples nowadays don’t shy away from flaunting their love in front of the world and are least bothered what others will say.

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Same-sex love and relationships can work out best for both boys and girls. They live in a happy place and in fact, some are pretty successful. Even heterosexual relationships tend to break after a while, including marriages. But these relationships last longer. The reason is that they have fought with the world to be together. This makes their bond stronger.

A lot of factors play an essential role when you opt for this beautiful relationship. One is, realizing the fact that you’re in love with a girl. You cannot change your feeling about it as it is inborn. You have to accept it, respect it and simply follow your heart. Making a big deal out of it will simply create more problems for you. Discussing your feelings and emotions can be very helpful, as emotional support plays a huge role. Shoutout to those families who are paving the way for love, by the way!

Many lesbian relationships face huge criticisms from their families. But sometimes you are lucky enough to get all the love and support from them. Also, you never know you might be lucky enough to get all the love, blessings and support from them.

Lesbians shouldn’t be ill-treated. I’ve personally seen lots of them at my workplace and in college, and they are fun to be around. I’ve seen them getting equal importance and respect from everyone just like we get it from our bosses, colleagues, teachers and others.

There are a lot of myths about lesbians, and half of them are not true. Like all lesbian couples know other lesbians. Well, that is utter nonsense. Do all straight people know everyone? No, right? Same goes with these, too. People say that all lesbians hate men. This is simply untrue. Just because they love women that doesn’t mean they hate men. They are not attracted to men, that is it. But at the same time, they don’t get attracted to all the girls they see. Some also believe that all lesbians are vegetarians. Seriously? There is no logic behind this.  Food preference has nothing to do with sexual orientation.

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Since there are so many myths revolving lesbians and their relationships, it is essential to know the truth. So, let’s dig in and know the awesome facts about lesbian relationships:

1. It is like having a girl roommate for life long

Having a girl roommate is always fun, isn’t it? I’m sure most of us will be able to relate to this. There are lots of girls who live together as roommates. It is like having a soul sister for life. You and your partner can do all the fun stuff together and simply enjoy every single day. The best part of this is that you know that your girl is never going to leave you. That makes you even happier. Late-night talks to having pyjama parties, you can enjoy everything with your girl, that too every day. This is one of the most awesome facts about lesbian relationships.

2. You can relate to her by all means

Can’t agree anymore with this awesome fact about lesbian relationships. Heterosexual relationships face a lot of problems. It can be about anything which creates a lot of differences between a man and a woman. Both man and woman have their own point of views which differ from each other, and it results in frequent conflicts. But if you date a girl, it is all the same. From sharing period problems to all the beauty hacks, only a girl can relate to it.

3. Sharing stuff

If you date a guy, you won’t be able to share all of your personal stuff with him. But if you date a girl, what is hers is your and vice versa. Isn’t this one of the most awesome facts about lesbian relationships? From clothes to cosmetics to purses to bags to sandals, you can share everything. Plus it will be fun to shop together. We all know how girls are crazy about clothes. Both you and your partner can buy different types of clothes so that you can wear each others’.

4. Make out anywhere

Now, this is one of the most amazing facts about a lesbian relationship. You can have a chance of having a quickie anywhere. From public restrooms to theatres, you can enjoy anywhere and everywhere. The risk of being caught is pretty less. Also, it is less embarrassing than what the heterosexual couples face.

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5. No consciousness of how you look

When you open up in front of a guy, you tend to get conscious about the way you look. But with lesbians, there is no such fear. What you have, she has the same, and there is no comparison. There is no demand for having bigger butts or bigger boobs for your satisfaction. You kind of respect your partner and accept her the way she is.

6. No need to use contraceptives and protection because of no fear of pregnancy

As we all know, a girl can’t conceive without having intercourse. Also, couples have to be extremely careful and use protection to reduce the chances of pregnancy. However, we all know, sometimes even protection doesn’t work. But when you date a girl, the fear of pregnancy is zero to nil. Isn’t this one of the most awesome facts about lesbian relationships? Unless, of course, you are thinking of Jurassic Park because I have no idea how that would work for humans.

7. Gossip about others all the time without worrying

This point should be taken in a fun way. Just recollect the moments when you meet your girl gang, one of the fun things you like to do is gossip. Be it about boys or other girls or about some other random stuff. At one point, your girl gang will get tired about you gossiping. But you can do this with your girl partner all day long. And the best part of it is, she won’t judge for doing this. Having some interesting gossip sessions is always a great idea of having fun.

8. Cry freely in front of your girl

A study suggests men are much more emotional than women. However, they tend to hide their emotions, unlike women. You must have cried several times in your life. No matter how often you cry and how badly you cry, your girl will surely be there for you. She won’t judge you or be fed up, unlike some men. She won’t hate you or cringe just because you’re crying. Express all your pain in front of her, and she will patiently listen to you. The most important thing, she might probably be able to relate to your problem and support you. And this is the beauty of lesbian relationships.

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9. Fight for each other’s rights

While in a normal boy-girl relationship, both have to struggle to get their rights. And while doing this, none of them is able to offer enough support to each other. But this is not in the case of lesbian relationships. Both you and your girl will be working for the same rights. And when you two will unite, there is nothing that can stop you. From facing societal pressures to fighting them, you can do it all together with each other’s support.

10. Both hold equal importance

Being in a same-sex relationship, this is one of the best perks. You both will have equal rights on each other. Unlike the husband-wife relationships, where the husband dominates the wife in some or the other way. Even if you both live together, all the decisions will be taken mutually with each other’s consent. No one will be biased. From deciding the lunch/dinner menu to planning holidays to making investments, everything will be mutually discussed.

11. No partiality in doing household chores

While we have always seen women looking after the house when men go to work. It is not the same in lesbian relationships. Both you and your partner will understand each other’s work and divide all the household chores equally. One of them won’t bear the burden of doing everything.

12. Checkout others without even letting them know

Lesbians are no different. They too enjoy having some fun. They too like to check out other men and women. Well, there is no harm in this. Actually, it is sort of fun. And they can do this without even letting others know about it. Checking out hot men and women with your ladylove can be fun.

13. Lesbians, too, get married to have normalcy in life

Lesbians too go through to the same feelings and emotions, just like a man and a woman goes through when they are together. They too need a feeling of security and want to live a normal life like others. So, they do believe in the institution of marriage. So for them, marriage is equally important just like a man and a woman.

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14. No pressure of having a baby

Now, this is one of the most awesome facts about lesbian relationships. Since there is no pressure of marriage, the option about having a baby is completely upon you and your partner. Also, if you’re thinking about adopting a baby, there is no need to get married. You can adopt one even without being married. That is the beauty of this kind of relationships. However, a man and a woman can’t even think about this because of the fear of family and society.

15. Adopting a baby and raising it with each other’s help

Now in case you and your partner want to experience the beautiful phase of being parents, you can adopt a baby. However, this is totally optional. But the baby who gets adopted by a lesbian couple will be the luckiest one. Wondering why? While there are some people in the world who crave for mother’s love, this baby will be blessed with two mommies. Doesn’t that sound beautiful? Having said that, the baby will be raised by two powerful and independent women. Isn’t that great? If you adopt a girl, it is like extending your fun girl gang. If you adopt a boy, he will get to hang out with two super cool mommies.

Being Open to Lesbian Relationships

All the above points are enough for you to express your love to the one who you have fallen for. There are many pros and cons of being in a relationship. But instead of focusing on cons, you should look on the positive side and moreover, listen to your heart.

With things changing in our country, we are hoping to see more and more lesbian relationships and couples coming out of the closet. I would personally love to see lesbians in India getting married. Both dressed beautifully as brides and taking their wedding vows.

A shout out to all the girls and their beautiful partners out there and we wish them all the happiness.

Aren’t these reasons enough for you and your partner to be together? Share your views with us. We would love to hear from you!